Friday, 3 October 2008

It lives!

Attention!!!
The new address for this blog is
http://worldofgruntfuttock.blogspot.com/
You are commanded to go there now.

Wednesday, 1 October 2008

The end of an era...

Bad news I'm afraid folks. It appears that AOL are closing down their blog sites very soon, so this will be my last post at this address. Fear not though, as I shall be relocating on blogger in the next couple of days. Keep 'em peeled for details of my new address.

Keep on truckin'.

Today's Haiku Film Review:

Snow White and the Seven Dwarves (1937) -

Happy, Dopey, Doc,
Sneezy, Sleepy, Grumpy and...
Who's the other one?

Friday, 26 September 2008

Busted Rhymes

US Rapper and ugly one in The Pussycat Dolls, Busta Rhymes has won a high court battle to stay in the country, after being held under armed guard for 12 hours at London City Airport. He is performing at the Royal Albert Hall for Orange RockCorps, but his passport was red flagged because of 'unresolved convictions' in the US. When stopped at immigration he allegedly stated "Can't ID me. There's not a problem my squad can't fix; pass the courvoisier."

Many apologies for not writing anything for a few days, but I've had problems of a PC nature. I am pleased to announce, however, that Mark Kermode saw fit to plug my book 'Haiku Sci-Fi Film Reviews' on BBC Radio Five Live today:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00dk801

Today's Haiku Film Review:

Artificial Intelligence: AI (2001) -

With Kubrick now dead,
Steven Spielberg had a go,
A, I, A, I ... D'oh!

Monday, 22 September 2008

Move over Darling...

 Fasten your seatbelts! Chancellor Alistair Darling has warned of a "bumpy road ahead" for the economy in the months to come, during his keynote address at the Labour Party conference. But he went on to assure everyone that we were in capable hands under the current Prime Minister, with the experience and judgement to guide us through "very uncertain times". His powerful oration silenced his critics and will certainly bring an end to calls for both men to step down.

In completely unrelated news, David Milibrand has allegedly been seen shopping for new curtains.

 

Today's Haiku Film Review:

 

All About Eve (1950) -

 

Bitchiness abounds

In this Hollywood classic.

Bette Davis on fire!

Sunday, 21 September 2008

Remember The Alamo!

 FBI agents and police have raided the compound of evangelist group The Tony Alamo Christian Ministries in Fouke, south of Texarkana, Arkansas, in an investigation into alleged child pornography. Their leader, Tony Alamo, has previously been convicted of tax evasion and accused of child abuse, though he stated he was not "into pornography": why bother with pictures when you can have the real thing. The 'church' opposes homosexuality, the US government and, interestingly, Catholicism - they appear to be happy with the Father and the Son, but find the Holy Ghost to be a bit of a gooseberry!

 

Today's Haiku Film Review:

 

Miracle on 34th Street (1947) -

 

See courtroom drama,

As old man makes mockery

Of jurisprudence.

Saturday, 20 September 2008

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Astrakhan

 Millionaire author JK Rowling, creator of the Harry Potter franchise, has donated £1m to the Labour Party, they announced today. She stated that she approved of Gordon 'Aloysius' Brown's record on child poverty and rejected Conservative tax plans. The donation, however, is unlikely to make much of a dent in the £18m debt that the party amassed in the last general election campaign, unless Jack 'Sid James' Dromey, party treasurer, can come up with some cunning investment scheme.

 Gordon Aloysius Brown

 

Today's Haiku Film Review:

 

Groundhog Day (1993) -

 

Repetitious? No!

A film you'll watch again and

Again and again.

Friday, 19 September 2008

Gordon Brown, texture like scum...

 Team GB has arrived in Manchester ahead of the Labour Party conference, which starts tomorrow and is likely to be a tough ride for the PM. Whilst visiting a local school he said: "This is the best job in the world, because every day there are new challenges. But every day you get up in the morning saying, 'how can I help make things better?'" Even the kids didn't have to think too hard about that one.

 

On the Haiku front, I've got good news - my three published works, 'Haiku Film Reviews', 'Haiku Horror Film Reviews' and 'Haiku Sci-Fi Film Reviews', are now all available at selected retail outlets including The Cinema Store, Gosh! Comics, Orbital Comics and the BFI Shop (all in the London area only, I'm afraid). Happy Shopping!